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vicky-smith

Fear can trap you in a job you hate

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Workplaces are filled with employees who hate their jobs but are afraid to move on.

The paralysis stems from a misguided belief that the regular paycheque coming in provides security.

By succumbing to our fear of change, we give up our power to choose. We leave it to others to determine when we get the pink slip, which shatters our false security.

Fear is devastating because it blocks true realization of the potential we possess to enhance our lives.

Peter Urs Bender, in his book Leadership From Within states, “Fear is rampant in our society. We are afraid to lose our jobs. Afraid of crime and the state of our environment. We are also afraid to take risks to fail or speak out. Fear blocks our feelings about doing and saying what comes naturally.”

Our fears are deep-seated and inhibit us from taking risks that could positively alter our lives.

The various fears that hold us back include the fear of:

– Being embarrassed

– Dealing with conflict

– Losing control

– Being rejected

– Losing status

Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Do the thing we fear, and the death of fear is certain.”

Before we can act we need to understand the fears that hold us in unhappy and stressful situations.

When was the last time you took a day with no interaction or interruptions to reflect on your vision for your work life and what holds you back from realizing it? Taking the time to do some honest self-assessment is the first bold step to confronting fear.

Risks

“The world we live in brings thousands of challenges — financial, emotional, and physical,” Bender says. “Many bring pain and frustration. You can go through them kicking and cursing, wishing things would stay the same, holding on to what you have, or you can make a decision to change.”

Making decisions to act on our fears requires taking risks and most of us don’t like doing that.

Bender gives the following suggestions to stretch beyond our comfort zone:

– Do things you don’t usually do — if you never set goals, set a few and achieve them.

– Repeat an uncomfortable activity — if you fear something do it as many times as it takes for you to feel comfortable.

– Make choices — start with small decisions and then graduate to bigger ones.

– Announce your intentions in clear, definite statements, using words like “I will” or “I won’t.”

– Act now instead of procrastinating. Ask yourself: while procrastination may be comfortable, am I getting the results I want?

– Risk not being perfect — if you wait until you know everything, you will never act.

Fear is normal

Having fears is normal; it’s the way we’ve been socialized. It’s difficult to take risks when we are not sure they will really lead to having more fulfilled lives.

But it all boils down to how happy you are in your job.

If you’re not happy, consider what changes you need to make. Tackle your fears by setting small goals initially and accomplishing them.

Look at yourself as the director of your life. Tackle each day by asking “What can I create or experience that’s within my control to change?”

We cannot eradicate fear our lives, but we can manage it. Good management comes from understanding what we fear and making bite-size decisions to overcome it. Life is just too short to go to work every day and hate it.

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